Just before moving out I managed to squeeze in a birthday party for Sophia. I don’t know if I was slightly crazy to do this. It sure was busy!
Pictures tell many words and my brain is only halfway functional, so here’s the story:
And a false start to filming Sophias end of term dance. This picture actually gives a very good impression of what this performance was like. My parents and I were crying with quiet laughter. Sophia got way into it. Good for her.
I really liked this quote from here.
White is great when it’s a color amongst other colors, but when it’s meant only to contain, suppress, and keep other colors at bay, you may want to resist its temptation. Our lives aren’t “pure” and “perfect,” and our homes don’t have to be either.
I’m not huge on interior decorating, my homes just ending up a collection of the things I have and find, rather than a purposeful project. I do appreciate beautiful homes and I have definite ideas about our future home (which, in my mind, features mostly natural materials, feeling unable to improve on nature).
But this quote summarizes a lot of what a feel about life. Our lives are not perfect and we shouldn’t try to pretend they are.
I’m sure I will talk about this in future, as one thing coming up in my uni course is the emergence of ‘the working poor’, those who accept and get into mahoosive amounts of debt in order to have large and perfect (and unsustainable) homes. Apparently Australians have always been like this as witnessed and commented on by Charles Darwin in his 1836 visit:
“…the whole population, poor and rich, are bent on acquiring wealth…the number of large houses and other buildings just finished is truly surprising; nevertheless everyone complains of the high rent and the difficulty of acquiring a home.”
From “Sydney/Purgatorio,” by Craig San Roque in Psyche and the City, Edited by Thomas Singer, as quoted in Linley Luttons Viva la Revolution (2010)
So, this phenomenon has been around for a long time and I wonder if the tide can be turned simply by consumers refusing to endorse these exorbitant amounts of debt and build smaller houses more within their limits.
Really, there is much more to life than living in perfect, large houses.
P.S. It’s good to be back on this blog. We have been very busy and tired from packing up our home. We have basically managed to fit all of our worldly possessions on the back of a truck (a very small truck – basically a glorified ute!), and Henry still thinks we could get rid of more. Hopefully life will settle into a rhythm once more. We are moving to Young, NSW in two days and will settle there for 6-8 weeks while we build our bus – talking about small homes!
We have a ‘pet’ possum who lives in our roof. Every now and then she thunders across our ceiling or over our roof. There is a tree right up against our house and it forms a bridge to the plum tree at our fence. That is where she feasts every night on plum leaves and whatever she can find on the lawn. We toss our apple cores under the tree and I guess she picks them up. Actually, there are two. A mummy and a baby. I’m not sure if baby has grown up and left home, and I’m not sure if our visitor the other night was mum or bub, but it was one of them.
And actually, on thoughts, it might be that baby as Henry has been feeding it out of his hand since he was able to toddle away from his mummy months ago. And we fed this one.
He also weed our food – after we had eaten it all. It was perfect timing actually – if being weed on can be thought of like that. Pete and Jen had just taken the last bun and filled it with the Philly Cheese Steak filling, noone was sitting at the table at this point and then down came a shower! We couldn’t eat any more of that Cheese Steak, but there wasn’t much there, and when you have dogs and chooks food is rarely wasted – especially steak. Chester was pleased!
Speaking of chooks. We have them no more. We were oh so sad to see our lovely chickens off to Pete and Jens new place this night. They are the loveliest chickens I’ve ever had. We are only happy because we have sent them to a good home. We are very happy about that.
Today is full of cleaning blinds, flyscreens, bathroom and prepping for Sophias party. Goals. Wish me luck!
Even though we are having a PINK party, she is dead set on a Merry-Go-Round cake, and so, thanks to Canon Creative Park, I am making a paper merry go round for the top. This week is not the week for complicated cake decorating! I just hope I get it all done. If I get off the internet now I guess I will! Farewell.
If things go quiet, you will know that I am caught up with the move.
xo
It’s been fairly quiet, with hubby out working and many little things to do. Gradual de-cluttering (it is hard letting go of stuff isn’t it, but it sure does feel liberating when you do! – evidence of a slowly changing awareness.), cleaning, writing, studying, teaching (kiddies), walking, playing, party planning cooking, all that…and, oh, catching up with the dearest of friends who have come back to Canberra. That has been wonderfully refreshing.
I was sad not to take pictures of the mid morning – stretching into mid afternoon – ‘brunch’ we had with these friends. It was such a precious time with us four couples who so naturally and sweetly slot together, whose children play very well together, who so comfortably talk about anything with no judgement, but perhaps a bit of laughing at ourselves and at each other, which friends are so good for, all of it couched in love.
I’ve found I’ve grown the most through these committed, loving, natural friendships where the stretch is gentle and self-awakening. And so I assume, by being involved in these most beautiful of friendships the growth occurs all around, and my only hope is that everyone has wonderful friends like I do.
That was Easter Friday.
Today we are couching it in, the kids are having a video day. I’ve been making sure not to give them any TV time except when needed and so we intentionally go days without any videos, so that I can give them a big sit in with some fun videos without any guilt!!
Here’s a glimpse through our week, showing you how we got to this day where we are going to sit on our bottoms all day and r e s t.
It started with this beautiful ringlet on this beautiful forehead. 
We dropped their daddy off at the Governor General House open day to work, and we ducked next doorish to my Nonnas house with their Nonna (my mum) and went for a walk through ‘the forest’. Autumnal colours are just beginning to emerge.
Sophia, of course, found a tree to climb.
And daddy found them.
I’ve started my early morning running up again. Now that the weather has cooled off, and my favourite fogs and sharp, crisp morning air are back to greet me in the morning, it is something I anticipate and savour. The earliest mornings are the best of times.
And the Folk Festival. It’s an annual family event. The boys band played. I spent a bit of time chasing kids around – meaning: no pictures, sadly. I took a few afterwards when Henry was free to help. He has a calming influence on the children, I don’t know what I’d do without him sometimes.
Gunther tried his hand at ‘daddys work’. We have a picture of Sophia doing this at the Folk Festival four years ago. She was five days old.
Look at her today. We tried to join in on the dancing, but Soph was too tired to enjoy it. She was clamouring to go home, which we shortly did.
But not before doing a few essential jumps.
And here we are. Movie day. Thank you very much. I’m ready for this day.
Happy Easter all.
xo
I have been thinking a lot about options and limits lately. It has been my studies that has brought this on, I will concede. That, I guess, is what uni studies are supposed to do – draw your thinking out into areas previously left unexplored.
LIMITS. We feel pretty unlimited, don’t we? We have umpteen career choices, cheap enough travel options, the pick of places to live. If we don’t like something we change it fairly easily. New bedspread. New couch. New TV.
We could spend our lives getting new things. Upgrading. Forever upgrading. Upgrade suburbs. Upgrade house (in fact upgrading houses seems to be the major drive for many of us westerners. (Rental > buy small house > buy larger house > buy/build dream house > die > live in coffin.)
Seems a bit petty looked at like that, doesn’t it.
We feel free, but we, like everyone else, are constrained by limits.
We can choose between this, this and this dress. This one made in China, this one made in China and this super duper expensive one made in Australia…so either ten cheap dresses or one pricey one? Well, what’s your choice?
We can wear these, these or these shoes.
They haven’t made this shoe yet, so it’s not an option.
We can choose to live in this house on the beach, this one in the city centre, this house in the country, but oh, we can’t live in that one because there’s no work there and to get a house you have to go into debt and there’s no work where that house is. Options.
If we’re a bit game we could think outside the box a little. We are going to live in a converted Bedford bus. Another person lives in a smallish sail boat and goes around the world for the next three years (yes, there are people who do this – even some with kids). Another person chooses to be homeless (yes, there are people like this too). Sometimes these choices come with unfavourable consequences. Homelessness really limits your social life, you can never really have anyone over for dinner. You can’t really have anyone over for dinner when you are in the middle of the Pacific either, you will have to put your career on hold if you are sailing, too. Sailing a boat takes up a bit of time.
Travel! We are unlimited when it comes to travel, aren’t we? I could travel to Greenland, Africa, Britain, South America. What fun. Me the tourist. Footloose, fancy free. Never mind the appalling polluting force that airplane travel is. The world can worry about that, not me.
Well, yes. See this graph.-VVV- The consequences of my polluting force will affect people other than me. My choices will limit other peoples options. As long as my options remain unfettered what have I to care about?
That there is typical Western nonchalance. But….I find…that I can’t be like that, much apologies.
We think we have options, but we are sold our choices. We can choose between three thousand and thirty three toys, but you can’t have no toys, not in our culture. We can drive a car, catch a bus (I can’t, not where I live), catch a train (again, not I), walk (20ks to the shops for me), ride a bike, but try living locally – you just can’t – not in most places! We are expected to use our cars, especially in Australia.
Further afield. I would love to travel. I would gladly go by ship. But why? Ships are so s l o w, and one couldn’t be slow, could one. Faster is better, isn’t it? Well, is it? Flying would greatly grate on my principles, and ships don’t go everywhere these days. So I am limited.
We are surrounded by limits. But we fear them. We must be able to choose between several pairs of shoes, so be offered the option of ‘this pair or nothing’ feels constricting. Why can we not limit our consumption ourselves? If we do not do it now, if we do not choose a life of self-imposed-limitations, surely into the future either someone else will do it for us or the earth will do it for us.
Since 1971 heatwaves in Australia have been getting more frequent and longer. Some people like to ignore the science. Ignorance is bliss. With knowledge comes power and also responsibility (to change). And we do not want to change. We do not want to give up this (illusion of a) limitless life which we have inherited. We feel entitled to all these options – never mind at what or at whose expense.
Eventually our inaction will lead to the earths reaction. And that can not be ignored or changed or simply overcome. There is little you can do about the weather.
Throughout history we have managed to fit our options around the weather. Air conditioned & heated cars. Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter fashion. Houses which are inefficient and plug into terribly costly (in every way) external energy sources in order to cater to the comfort of their inhabitants. And I know, some of you enjoy the heat and hate the cold. But a Summer which differentiates between blisteringly hot and just hot? No thanks. And brief winters in which we experience fierce hailstorms, incredible cold snaps, extremely cold night and warm days? Some of us may adapt, some of our precious cars and houses and things may get through, but will our crops and animals? Nature doesn’t adapt quickly and the past century has accelerated pressure on the earth in many ways.
There is lots of fear mongering around this subject. But to me it’s clear.
We are greedy and we are selfish and we are driven by money, fear and power and we ought not to be.
The world has chosen a path, it has chosen between its options. We are on a path. The path doesn’t fit. Our tower of babel ambitions do not fit with the limitations of this world. We are gods on this earth and we are making our presence known. The less powerful are suffering under our weight but still we go on. We are gods and we must continue to be gods. If we are not the gods who will be? We fear. We fear life. We fear death. We are only safe in our consumerism. When we consume we know we are powerful, we know we are limitless, we know we have options. When we consume we can define ourselves by design. We applaud our growth economy, we see it as a way out of the limitations of nature, of localism, we do not (well, I do) see it as a hungry, greedy creature out to consume more and more of the worlds resources.
I love this beautiful world. We have created nothing better than the natural wonders of this planet. This planet should form our limitations, not our own greed. We can be humble about it. We can humbly accept natural limitations, not fearfully strive to overcome them.
There are other options out there, not just the ones we create and sell.
Hey,
So I’ve changed this blog around a little bit, including the title. I’m guessing you’ve noticed!
This blog sprung out of my former website as a photographer. That photography thing is no longer happening – for so many reasons, not least is the fact that I am no longer going to be in one spot for very long at all for the next couple of years. So the time for a developing photography business is definitely not now, if ever.
I didn’t agonize over a name, that not being my style. I waited til one made itself known. And it has. Funny title. Perhaps. But I opened my internal ears to something that described me and my family and particularly me and my family as we will be on this trip, as that is the central motive behind this blog. Something that wasn’t ‘Travelling ’round Australia with my fam’.
And Anyway. It’s true. Collectively we are fairly wild and scruffy, when it comes down to it. And also, in advocating alternative lifestyles (i.e. less consumerist, less indulgent…etc.), the title seems appropriate. I wouldn’t want to be scared of being a little bit wild and a little bit scruffy, a little bit untamed by modernisation. I really don’t think that’s such a bad thing.
Tip off: to keep with the corporate nature of the title the site address (url) will also be changing in the next couple of weeks – just fyi.
Sometimes, when I am waiting in line at the Supermarket checkout, I stare, dully, at the groceries of whoever is ahead of me, and because I am a sticky-beak I put the story all together in my mind. A story which is full of questions. I wonder how much you can tell of somebody by their groceries.
There is the older woman, she must be a pensioner, she buys the barest of essential ingredients. Milk. Tinned fish. Rice. Pasta. Tinned tomatoes. Onions. Bread. A few cup-o-soups. They are all home brand. I wonder if she has children, how old they are, if they live near her, if she has grandchildren, what has happened to bring her to this point where affording the simplest of groceries is difficult. Maybe, though, she is quite wealthy and saving even the smallest amounts of money on her food is strangely satisfying to her, a way she can feel in control of her life, of her expenses. Perhaps money is something to be squirreled away instead of spent on living.
A shiny woman in her thirties. Her hair is voluminous & well cut, she is about a size 18-20. Her clothes look expensive, but she is bulging out of them. There are two types of women in this category. Those who buy cake and those who buy diet soft drinks. One doesn’t care, loves her size, flaunts it and enjoys her food; the other one is really trying…but not really. I’ve been in the overweight camp after each of my pregnancies, and it is hard to lose it, so I sympathise.
The trendy looking couple, with fair trade everything. Checking the back of every label.
I like to note how many fresh ingredients I see in peoples trolleys. Sometimes it is hugely encouraging, seeing the clearly competent and confident mums with trolleys full of greens, other times a sad commentary on the state of our food system, with near everything in said trolley in a plastic bag or a brightly coloured box with brand names screaming loudly.
Well.
Food has forever been a centrifugal force in relationships and storytelling. So many stories converge in a supermarket. People passing like trolleys in the aisle, words unspoken, but the contents of trolleys speaking volumes, uttering a myriad of questions, stating simple facts about this increasingly complex world. Supermarkets are an icon of lost community, where even getting food is done without any need for relationship, especially with the introduction of self-serve checkouts, before these however ‘checkout chicks’ were merely human machines, just another cog.
This is the 20th century version of foraging. With the 21st century still in its infancy I wonder what they’ll think of next. I wonder if I will like it.
Drying Dandelion roots to make Dandelion tea.
Dandelions are one of those incredible plants which are often thought of only as an invasive weed, but instead are so much more. They make great companion plants in the garden, their long tap roots bringing up nutrients from below, making them available to other plants. The leaves, flowers & roots (everything but the stem) are all edible and great for the liver.
Better than buying the tea from the supermarket, which can be expensive, it is absolutely simple to make your own, just make sure you don’t pick all of them and I would avoid those which have been mown over, just not sure about the possibility of lead accumulating in them.
Pick
Wash
Dry
Grind
Steep
Tea!
It’s been an absence. I’ve been struggling along with an essay, my first in seven years – or more. I’m rusty!
Canberra had its 100th birthday, I had my 28th. Henry and I are officially in our late twenties and thirty is just around the corner. I don’t mind. I intend to live to 112 and have each year more productive than the last. I just feel I have so much to learn here on earth and so much I could potentially give. I want to give it all. Spend myself into the earth and into its people like nothing else. Of course, as a mum, you’ve got to spend yourself into your kids. Like everything, large scale change depends on the small actions of individuals. It is a wonderful and daunting concept.
In between Henrys absolutely exhausting work schedule the past week (I get the benefit of seeing the monumental effort that goes into these festivals that Canberra likes to throw!) We managed to squeeze in an early morning excursion to the balloon spectacular. We’ve been going to these since Sophia was in my tummy. I love early mornings and I love family outings, so this has been one of my absolute favourite events over the years.
Crazy balloon shapes have only recently popped up in this festival, what a highlight! Darth Vader. No way.
I’m not sure if the Peacock or ‘Franklin’ were Sophs favourites, I guess it doesn’t really matter. They were both cool.
It was a super early morning! 5.30am out the door, it was still dark. It was totally worth it, even though I paid for it through the day with super tired and crotchety kids.
Just to prove all four of us were there: Sophia, Gunther, Me & Henry.
We ducked off to get a coffee before I dropped Henry off at work. These kinds of dates make me jump for joy inside. I just love those happy, carefree times with my family. It’s absolutely right and delightfully fitting.
A few days later Henry was working again, this time at Skyfire. I am not generally a fan of Skyfire, fireworks: great. Crowds: totally not great. The music: not into it. But, showing kids fireworks for the first time: yes please!
So mum and I took them down to the lake, we made sure to go a good distance from the main area, with still a good view, and we did find the right spot.
The tower was rather thrilling for Soph as it changed from Pink to Red to Orange and on through the rainbow.
I only took a couple of photos as I mostly just wanted to cuddle my kids and enjoy the view with them. It is just beautiful seeing things like this through their eyes. Their ‘Wows’ and ‘oohs’ and ‘Look! It’s a shooting star!’ bring big light to older, staler senses. Children are one of the best things for us adults.
So our week wound on with a few resting days at home, a few gigs to go to and an Uncle up from Tasmania to spend time with.
Then came birthday day. Mums birthdays are never much I think. Mums are the ones who make birthdays happen for children and for husbands, but this time I had my first taste of my daughter taking care of birthday traditions.
Henry was sick as a dog, poor thing, he had to pop in to work, so we all went together and I dragged the kids around. We had fun jumping around Civic sculptures.
I feel this is rather an unusual fountain for a city centre, but when I read that it was bequeathed by Alexander Downer in honour of his father I saw it in a new light. Now I see a father raising up his son and passing on a gift which the son is reaching for. That is appropriate and a close father-son relationship ought to be honoured.
As our time in the city fast ran out and Henry was still working I did get cross. I hadn’t had a chance to do that retail therapy Henry had promised. So palmed the kids off on him and I dashed of, getting a few presents for the three other friends who have birthdays around mine and bought some new dresses from a favourite shop. (natural fibres and potentially ethical – though I’d definitely like to look into that!) It was very very brief, but when you become a mum even five minutes of rushed time alone is luxury – and retail therapy! Unheard of!
Then on to the Arboretum where we had a spot of lunch with my mum, dad and brother. I always think it’s appropriate to spend the anniversary of your birth with the people who are responsible for your arrival on the firmament. We had lunch in the absolutely amazing construction of the Arboretum ‘Village Centre’, high ceilings with wood highlights through the entire building. Then we rolled around on the lawn ampitheatre, well the kids did. And finished off with a chilled out stroll through the Himalayan Cedars and the rust coloured words, ‘Wide Brown Land,’ on the hill.
Finally, at home, Henry soldiered through cooking dinner, then crashed into bed for a nap. I whipped through the cleaning, then with two exhausted children finished off with a ‘birthday’ cake. By then though, I was totally over it, so I cut it up and headed outside to eat alfresco. Sophia was not too be put off. ‘Are we singing happy birthday?’ ‘No, we’ll just eat it and go to bed.’ ‘No, let’s sing happy birthday.’ A little pause. I just waited to see what she would do. ‘Come on Gunny, let’s sing Happy Birthday to mummy.’ So Gunny began: ‘Happy Birthday’, then Sophia: ‘To You!’, Gunther again: ‘Happy Birthday’, Sophia: To You! Then Soph sang all the way through to ‘Hip Hip!’ where Gunther joined in again with the ‘Hoorays!’
It was a beautiful moment, one of those times where you see and really notice how your little baby is growing into a big person with responsibilities and the ability to think of and look after another person.
The sun set and shone through the leaves of our plum tree making them glow and then it was bedtime.
Uncle David came with two of his mates, Henry crawled out of bed and we finished the day with beers and interesting conversation.
Now we are looking ahead to a PINK birthday party for Sophia in two weeks time and finally our move out of our village which has been home for 5 1/2 years, ready to step into life’s next adventures.
Tulitha King 
